a million bucks

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In some ways we are still in recovery mode from our housing exploits of 2011. Still, it’s easy to forget how our whole adventure got started, particularly given that we ended up a mere 18 blocks from where we started and in the same schools – which was entirely not our original intention. Funny how real life happens that way, huh?

So, just what was our intention for those who may not remember or heck, even have cared? In our dream of dreams, it was to find a gem. A diamond in the rough, if you will. Yes, we had some very specific ideas in our head of what that might look like – lots of glass, light, built in the 60s, maybe, mid-centuryish, clean lines, something that was cheap enough to take and make our own. That was, well, as I just mentioned – our dream of dreams. The flip side – and this is where Jeff and I didn’t always agree – was that I’ve always personally really liked ranch-style homes – if not built in the 60s, then the 50s could work, too. (Jeff’s issue with many ranches was their long, narrow, closed in-feeling.)

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kaleidoscope

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My kaleidoscope

Last month my boss decided to start our staff meeting by having everyone tell the best gift they had ever received or had ever given – in honor of Packy the elephant’s upcoming 50th birthday celebration at the zoo.

I immediately thought of the kaleidoscope that Jeff had given to me not long after we started dating around 13 years ago now. It was made of green stained glass welded in the shape of a triangle. At the end was a small tube with glitter-like stuff in clear liquid. The beautiful colors came from flipping it around. I thought it was a nice gift until he explained that he was giving it to me because it symbolized how I made him feel. That’s when I think it became the best gift I have ever received.

For several years, I kept that kaleidoscope front and center on the bookshelf in my little den in two different houses, until one day a couple of years ago I was moving things around and it fell, shattering everywhere. And by the way, I don’t know what kind of liquid is in those things, but it makes a mess! Needless to say, I was pretty bummed that my special gift was no longer. That is, until my next birthday when I opened a small, long white box to find the most beautiful new kaleidoscope inside. Heck, it even had its own little stand! My new kaleidoscope sits on the dresser in our room, in a place of honor along with newborn pictures of Ian and Elena, and another beautiful gift from Jeff – a handcrafted wooden jewelry box that’s as much art as jewelry holder.

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who doesn’t love a visit from the tickle monster?

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About a week and a half ago it occurred to me that Easter might be approaching soon. I think had something to do with all the rabbits, eggs and candy displayed at every turn. Then, there was the actual calendar viewing which revealed it was a little more than a week away. Ahh – caught off guard again! That’s okay. Fortunately the Easter Bunny knows how to kick things into high gear when the situation calls for it. Target took care of the basics: buckets, grass, cards, some candy (with leftovers for the Easter Bunny and her partner, of course). What was missing was that little extra “something.”

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appreciation

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For some crazy reason, Mother Nature decided to bless us with not one, but two beautiful days this weekend where it actually pretended to be spring for real: sunshine, blue skies, flowers coming into full bloom. In fact, it was three days – including today – but given that I spent my day inside, I only really count Saturday and Sunday.

And just to show how deprived we are, it was the talk of our office this morning. And, I’d bet money on the fact that it was the talk of almost every other office in Portland this morning. Across town, conversations went something like this:

How was your weekend? It was wonderful! How could it not have been with that weather??

I know, I know. I spent all weekend outside doing XX…

Even better, if we were to be granted two days in a row of sunny, “warm” weather (low to mid-60s), I was delighted that it happened the weekend of Ian’s first t-ball game on Saturday morning and Easter on Sunday.

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guilt

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A few months ago my friend at work who is a former stay-at-home-mom (and in the process of becoming a single mom) asked me if I ever felt guilty about the time I spend at work away from my kids. It took me approximately .53 seconds to answer, “No.”

Having been through the stay-at-home mom (SAHM) routine longer than I originally intended made me 185% certain that I am not SAHM material. I refuse to feel guilty about saying that I don’t want to spend 24/7 with my children. I need another outlet. Some don’t. I do. It makes me a better mother. That, I know. To each their own.

It helps that I have a job that fulfills me, and that both of my children are in places that both Jeff and I feel at peace with in terms of knowing that it fulfills their needs. One day not too long ago I left work a little early and picked Ian up from after-school care. His greeting: “Mommy, why are you here early today? I didn’t get to finish playing…” And while Elena often greets us very enthusiastically, we don’t leave the building before she proactively hugs every teacher in sight who bid her farewell by name. She’s happy, and that makes us happy. However, had my friend asked me that same question earlier this evening, for the first time since I’ve been back to work, I may have hesitated with my answer.

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